A woman of many shades...

Intezaar

2011-11-11T17:08:00.005+10:30

Khidki kinaare baithe intezaar karna, fuzool hai,

Na deewaarein bolti hain, na darvaaza khadakta hai,

Dil-e-naushad zameen par gir, kai tukdo main bikhar jaata hai,

Hum unhi tukdo ko chunne main, mashgool hua karte hain... :)

Picture by *Dolbsha

Taking the long way around

2011-10-05T00:38:00.005+10:30

I crave for thee, my soulful self,
When all else is washing away,
You stand there, silently,
Gazing deep in endless depth.

No cries, no tears, not even a whispering sound,
Hand in hand with my soulful self,
We are taking the long way around.

Taking the longest way around :)

Picture by ~lilpastshadow

Lovers

2011-09-23T16:25:00.006+09:30

Stop.
Coiling in her brain like snakes do.
Hiss.
But, do not poison.

Coil around her neck.
Strangle.
With all the mighty power that you have, lover.
Start.

Lovers, eh?

Picture by angtuldok

Salty water

2011-09-15T00:09:00.006+09:30

He carried me across the ocean
On his back
Like a snail carries its shell.

Whether I am home to him
Or he is to me
Only the giant waves can tell.

If these waves billow greatly,
It is surely a sign, my dear
They are not the ones to cry needlessly
The shore just maybe near.

If over these waves today we fly,
We may fathom their endless depth,
If in these waves today we drown,
We can stop chasing that fleeting crown.

But if in this ocean today we live,
We can suck the salty water off each others mouths.
Fun, right?

Picture by ~nectar666

Smoke baby smoke

2011-09-05T18:56:00.004+09:30

Cigarettes and smoke
Linger in the air
Like the scent of his skin.

Tiny spirals
Go round and round
Like the words that he coined

Caught in between is she
In all her misery
Limping ahead
For one gasp of air.

Picture by *spacecadet18

Whether you like it, or not.

2011-08-16T15:55:00.007+09:30

It is the wind that blows you in different directions,

Sways you away from one port to another,

Carries you, tarries you,

Whether you like it, or not.

It is the wind that often shows you the way,

Takes you forward and lets you stay,

Caresses your face, slows you down in the race,

Whether you like it, or not.

Picture by ~BlackJack0919

Some came into my life for a reason, others for a season and one for a lifetime.

2011-05-28T21:59:00.014+09:30

I went on a 3 days spiritual retreat which helped me get closure in some areas of my life. It was my chance to enjoy solitude and I had many opportunities to reflect on my past, present and future. While on retreat, I came across a beautiful poem that I'd like to share with you. I hope that helps you answer some unanswered questions about your life. Godspeed!

Reason, Season, or a Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

— Brian.Andrew."Drew".Chalker

Thank you 'B' for being the one for a lifetime :)

Picture by Omega300m

To those who depart and don't part

2011-05-22T21:21:00.007+09:30

I kissed the walls goodbye
And bid farewell to the streets
that I once frequented
So often and so very often

The clouds cleared up that morning
Just so I could stare in the Sun's eyes for one last time
Before I leave

That night even the breeze caressed my face
And the trees hung down their branches
For one last touch.

The morning after my world changed.
With an immigrant visa lying firmly in my breast pocket.

Picture by ~kestane

Not gone with the wind

2011-05-19T21:34:00.010+09:30

As I quietly lay in my bed that night,
I could hear the soft wind rustle gently against the window panes,
As the night went on,
The wind whistled, bellowed, strengthened its fervour,
Made its presence felt.

Thunderous nights often lead to strange dreams.

Dreams where promises seem empty,
Hopes seem rusty,
Life seems unworthy.
Dreams wherein dreams die.

I can hear the soft wind rustling gently against the window panes, tonight.

Picture by Sahasara

Dirty Laundry

2011-05-03T22:19:00.005+09:30

There are some stains that don't come off easy. Stains of hope. Stains of fear. Stains of love. Stains of despair.

Stains that get darker with every wash.

There must be a miraculous ingredient in tears :)

Picture by Kaytee Photography

Home

2011-04-10T23:57:00.009+09:30

The cracked plaster on those walls
where I scratched the surface with my unkempt nails
To check what lies underneath

That disheveled store room
which I often rummaged
To find hidden treasures

That wall where I carved my name with the compass
from the orange geometry box
in freshly wet paint

It must still be there
It was 05.11.1994
It hasn't been repainted since.

I hope.

Picture by ~gilad

To hell with the daisies

2011-03-05T18:09:00.006+10:30

Is it just a whim of my mind
Or
Are the daisies actually knocking on your door?

Wouldn't you open the door , my dear
Or
Would you shun them a little more?

It isn't their mistake, you know,

They are not the ones at fault.

Though you can treat them how you wish, my dear,

You can give it another thought.

But, what if the daisies die outside, my dear?

Where will we bury their fragrance?

Picture by *eibhilinnn

Little Miss Parasite

2011-03-01T19:55:00.006+10:30

She feeds off him like a parasite

It is beautiful to behold

She lives on him like a parasite

Under every inch of his skin fold

He cherishes the love from it

He is now addicted

He craves for another bite

It must be addictive.

She creeps under his skin

This time she makes it through

The blood vessels are so beautiful

Her eyes are dilated

With love.

Picture by colormefamous

It could have been a seasonal flu

2011-02-27T20:06:00.007+10:30

She cried for sunlight until the waves began to sink her feet in sand,

He bent down to kiss it until she swished him away,

They collected some odd shells on their way back home,

He knew how much she'd treasure them as her own.

It must have been spring

Or it may have been summer

Who knows what it will bring?

Who cares if it doesn't?

Though she went back to the sea one day,

There was sand and sunlight on the bay,

She scooped a handful of wet sand,

And, walked all the way back home,

It must have been spring

Or it may have been summer

Who knows what it will bring?

Who cares if it doesn't?

It brought her back home. Anyway.

Picture by under-milkwood

The music that she never really heard

2011-01-31T23:04:00.007+10:30

She played all those years on the fast forward option. It was difficult to rewind them. It all must have played in the background that she didn't know when to stop and listen. :)

Picture by~ignacy130

What a wonderful world

2011-01-11T19:01:00.005+10:30

As the airplane door opened at 10,000 ft up in the sky, he said "Jump!". I looked down and thought to myself "What a wonderful world":))

This picture shows the 360 degrees flip during the free fall!

Felt more alive in the sky than I have ever felt on Earth.

Check out my sky diving video on You tube. Click here.

To cind the rella?

2011-01-08T23:42:00.003+10:30

When the clock struck 12, reality dawned upon me. The dress, the jewels and the carriage did vanish in thin air.

And, as I ran down the stairs, I left one of my shoes in a hurry, just like in the fairytale.

Just that he never found the perfect foot for it.

Sigh!

Picture by ~ CanDan

When the sun goes down.

2011-01-02T01:10:00.003+10:30

From dawn to dusk, most birds fly back to their nests. Some birds, however, are still gathering twigs.

Picture by ~vabserk

.Contentment.

2010-11-29T12:03:00.004+10:30

Picture by~ Us! :))

The Expiration of Inspiration

2010-11-24T15:42:00.007+10:30

A part of me has died. It remains indiscernible if it happened for good or bad. All I am is a changed person who hates changes. I have a creative block that chokes me. I try to compensate for it by reading. I read a lot lately. Trying to find my voice through others' words.

Picture by ~ gutterface

Into the Wild

2010-09-29T01:14:00.001+09:30

"What if I were smiling and running into your arms? Would you see then what I see now?"

~Christopher McCandless
Into the Wild

Freedom

2010-09-06T17:42:00.001+09:30

Do you remember the day when I borrowed a bicycle from a complete stranger just to ride it down the slope? Do you remember how I rode it towards you while you stood there smiling?That moment is sketched in my memory and is called 'Freedom'.

Picture by ~hrj-e

Skin deep

2010-09-01T23:51:00.001+09:30

My third tattoo: My husband's name in Devanagari script in Hindi with a lotus underneath. It is on my back in the middle of my shoulder blades. The lotus symbol has many interpretations but there remains an essential meaning. The lotus represents spiritual enlightenment. For me, it represents greater clarity in life. Just like the lotus flower blooms out of the muddy potholes of life, so does a lotus tattoo represents inner clarity after having lived a life of chaos and strain. It is also a symbol of rebirth, a phase in life which leaves suffering behind..

Bhushan has brought about an emotional security in my life that I severely lacked. I feel complete. Well, just about :)

Six feet under and loved.

2010-08-22T19:38:00.003+09:30

I pass by the cemetery every Sunday when I travel by train. I always look closely to spot people with flowers in their hands, with love in their eyes and with memories in their hearts; memories that they want to keep fragrant.

That's when I slip back in my seat with a sense of satisfaction. Satisfied that it must have been a life worth living :)

Picture by ~kubica

Children

2010-08-07T22:17:00.001+09:30

Apart from other reasons that people site to have children, after careful deliberation, I have come to the conclusion that it is primarily because children give them a greater purpose in their lives.

Bringing those children up to the best of their capabilities becomes their calling in life, and sometimes, the only calling :)

Picture by *ziggwies

The Head, The Heart and The Soul

2010-07-19T22:42:00.000+09:30

When she placed his hand on her heart,

She saw the pain in his eyes

He quietly turned around and walked down the stairs,

Murmuring softly unto his own self

She heard his heart lament.

Quite loudly.

Picture by serayozbicer

To those who stole moments from MY life...

2010-07-05T22:01:00.001+09:30

I thank all those who visit and read my blog.

I appreciate your appreciation,however,copying my work and using it as your own is the worst form of appreciation you can exhibit. Lately I have come across a few blogs/websites where people have copied my work and published as their own without accrediting me or linking back to my blog ( by the publishing date you can see who wrote it first). There are legalities associated with it such as the Digital Millennium Copyright which can unfortunately make me strip you off those tiny shreds that you have left.

A few such blogs
http://nidhipasricha.blogspot.com

/http://indianfriendfinder.com/blog/isabella_/

And, I am sure that there are others too out there.

In one instance, I should be proud that you relate so much to what I write that you want to use it. In another instance, I pity you so much because you have to stoop so low to be who you will never be.

It hurts me to think what it is like being you.

With that said, let your conscience grip you. It has a firm hold.

Good Karma!

Wilderness

2010-07-03T19:10:00.001+09:30

She was there where the wild flowers were.

Where the creepers coiled around the giant tree barks.

And, that is where the rivers flowed freely and the rocks awaited one gentle touch from the waves.

This was her heaven.

Well, may be.

Picture by ~MissingHorcrux

A Perfect imperfection

2010-06-18T22:23:00.002+09:30

When your roving hands caress the stretch marks on my thighs,
And you lovingly gaze through the glasses on my eyes,

Then you vouch for my beauty on those bad hair days,
And when my unshaved pubes become a maze :)

That's when, my dear love, I become your perfect imperfection.
Loved perfectly.

Picture by the-x-stray

Perfection

2010-06-09T19:56:00.000+09:30

Her love might strangle him. Overwhelm him until he is neck deep in it, gasping for breath. She puts his head on her bosom every night like a mother tends to her newborn child. She has never been this perfect before.

And, that's the worry.

Picture by Kishui

To belong...

2010-05-20T21:55:00.004+09:30

He ran into her arms

Only to find

that he didn't belong.

Not there.

He turned around

and flew back

Only to belong

There.

Picture by~ Ilojleen

If it is about 'Happiness'...

2010-05-16T23:17:00.006+09:30

True happiness is not in the journey that you take where the sun shimmers your very soul;

It is about that journey which you take where your soul dazzles the very sun...

Picture by~kayjensen

With reckless abandon

2010-05-06T00:30:00.002+09:30

I tread on the flowers with reckless abandon

And when the sky bows down to kiss me

I lift my hands up in the air

And that is when, my dear reader,

I fly.

Picture by~archamtilnaad

Eat,Pray, Love.

2010-03-04T17:48:00.004+10:30

I have been reading Elizabeth Gilbert's 'Eat, Pray, Love' and since 'Shantaram' this is the only book I actually crave to read. I did have occasional brief encounters with other books picked up from thrift stores but eventually I fell for this one.

Eat,Pray,Love is an autobiographical account of Gilbert's journey to find everything across Italy, India and Indonesia. So, we ate a lot of pasticcino in Italy, consumed a lot of soul in India and are now feeding on love in Indonesia :)

What I wanted to share here was this poem she wrote to commemorate the end of her journey in India:

However.
If they'd let me wear pants made out of the
fresh-mown grass from this place,
I'd do it.

If they'd let me make out
with every single Eucalyptus tree in Ganesh's Grove,
I swear, I'd do it.

I've sweated out dew these days,
worked out the dregs,
rubbed my chin on tree bark,
mistaking it for my master's leg.

I can't get far enough in.

If they'd let me eat the soil of this place
served on a bed of bird's nests,
I'd finish only half of my plate,
Then sleep all night on the rest.

"You may return here once you have fully come to understand that you are always here."~ Elizabeth Gilbert

Picture by ~ passion-art

The Earth and The Sky

2010-02-22T02:01:00.003+10:30

I have often wondered what it is to succeed in life. Slowly but steadily I am beginning to get my answers. I firmly believe that when you are happy with who you are and content with what you have, you are a successful person.

Now,I pretty much am :)

Godspeed.

Picture by~~thc88

It was a Happy Birthday after all :)

2010-01-10T13:33:00.005+10:30

On my 24th birthday, I curled up on my bed at midnight and cried. Cried for reasons which are too unreasonable for me to fathom. Thank you B for bearing with me when I am unbearable, even for myself.

One day, I will grow up :)

Picture by~ bittersweetvenom

You can call it 'whatever'

2010-01-06T11:13:00.004+10:30

It is as fake as wearing a padded bra...

It is probably just an illusion that makes you 'feel' better. When some curtains are drawn, the scene changes. It often reflects your purpose or purposelessness. Live it up until he pulls the ground from under your feet.

Picture by ~Masto1602

Ring-a-ring o' roses

2009-12-22T01:38:00.008+10:30

2009 was a year during which I grew up. Officially :)

Lessons were learnt:

When the trees shed their leaves, it's time for new ones to grow.

Youth is missed.

Some people will wrap you around their fingers. Unwrap yourself.

There are very few people in this world who make your life just that bit simpler, easier and 'unadulterated'

Travel. It will open your mind.

Sex is over-rated.

Yes, that's love. You love who you are when you're with that person. Yes, I think that's what love is. I don't care if you disagree.

Fashion will always be in fashion.

Clothes and shoes are as good as jewellery. Money is even better.

Sometimes you have to 'unthread' yourself from some people, even if that word doesn't exist.

Driving is exhilarating. Speed is enlightening.

Don't have children if you don't know 'why' you want to have children. You can't have them 'just 'coz', oh well, I won't, not till I figure it all out!

Adrenalin junkies have a lot of fun :p

If music doesn't stir your soul, you need new strings.

When people get jealous of you, say 'Fuck yeah' and grin!

We all go home.

Before you know it will be 2011...

Picture by BenHeine

Step Up, Step Down

2009-11-18T02:08:00.003+10:30

Every step up on that staircase was a step closer towards her light.

The morning he pushed her down those stairs, she bled. Just a little.

It was still dark outside.

Picture by karolajna

Come as you are

2009-11-08T11:18:00.005+10:30

He picked up the saddle. He had made up his mind. He was the kind who found more pleasure in pursuit than in attainment. It is just that she fled from his clutches.

He still chases aimlessly in the darkness of the night and when the morning comes he lies down on fresh cut grass and dreams of the dreams that, I dare say, are 'dreams'.

Just then, he heard footsteps.

Unperturbed and Undone

2009-10-13T18:09:00.007+10:30

And it just seemed so fair

That he slowly untied all her knots

Whilst she lay there uninhibited

And exhaled her soul into the air

Picture By Gnesa

Who me?

2009-09-22T01:18:00.006+09:30

And they asked me who I was
I wondered if they knew
'cause we are neither black nor white
Not always old or new

I told them that I was the one
Who made a million mistakes
Who burnt the bridge and crossed the river
And maybe that's what it takes!

Picture by~ InSUNNYty

A Love Poem

2009-09-03T02:11:00.003+09:30

Me ; and he who reads poetry to me,
Entwined, Encircled and Enveloped in words

Those words which cease to be.

Picture by coopnkai

The girl who travelled in stories

2009-08-04T23:36:00.005+09:30

After many years, I went up the stairs of an old library. I breathed the scent of old paper. I got lost into the labyrinths of a book alley. My heart pumped and my feet fluttered with joy. I saw books, I dreamt of images,of a new world, I tip-toed around, touching the musk scented pages and immersing myself in their fragrance like a child plays around puddles.

I found some joy,again, which is there to stay...

Picture by Organiques

Are you a Roman?

2009-06-24T11:22:00.000+09:30

They say 'When in Rome, do as the Romans do.' Now, what position do they prefer???

Picture byDJKibyKat

To be and Meant to be

2009-06-21T14:44:00.000+09:30

Last Night while I instinctively Pine-Cleaned the stove top and he simultaneously poured Harpic in the shit-pot, I felt harmonious and realised that we were so meant to be :)

Picture By ~purplepawn

Ctrl+Z

2009-06-20T17:02:00.000+09:30

I sometimes wish I could Ctrl+Z a few things in life.

Picture By ~ZusaLiko

Soulmates or Soul Mates?

2009-06-16T00:43:00.000+09:30

Together with my life, other lives seem to be rolling. It is like people all around me are getting married. While I browse through their albums on Facebook, it's thought provoking as to how many of them have found their soulmates? Do soulmates really exist? Or is it just another Santa Claus to keep us warm on cold days?

Microsoft Word doesn't even recognise the word unless separated. :)

Picture by~Damaged Tears

A Walk With My Soul

2009-06-09T01:32:00.000+09:30

Today,

I have decided to walk barefoot on wet sand. I will untie my hair and loosen up the strings that hold me back.I will walk on the shore for as long as my feet don't fail me. I will sit on that solitary rock and listen to the ocean waves for as long as they can echo in my mind.

Tonight,

I have decided to walk with 'me' in my dreams.
And, thus, walk with 'you'.

Picture by~ciicha

For days when you feel like shit

2009-06-07T14:36:00.000+09:30

Some memories are like frozen food.

Always ready to be defrosted.

Picture by ~mamanz00

No rise without fall

2009-05-29T01:23:00.000+09:30

Can you see me?

I am a Phoenix

From my ashes

Destined to rise.

Can't you see me?

I am the Phoenix

Astray from destiny

Unless she dies....

The Long Road...

2009-05-15T21:45:00.000+09:30

For those whose hearts string like guitar chords and tap like the beats of a tabla...

Self-love

2009-05-12T13:29:00.000+09:30

For those of you who were misled by the title, I couldn't help but mention this website for playing with your pictures . It's free, easy and you can see the results up top. Did I hear someone call me a 'narcissist'? Where's the mirror???

To mother my mother...

2009-05-10T02:13:00.001+09:30

When she grows old and grey,
Your greatest reward in life will be to mother your mother...

Happy Mothers' Day.

Picture by~ Magical-Night

With love...

2009-04-13T00:00:00.000+09:30

As she walked on by, hiding the bouquet of red roses behind her just so he couldn't see it, she saw him standing there, smiling, with red roses in his hands...

Happy Anniversary Darling.

Picture by ~OhNoItsJoe

Bridging the Distance

2009-04-07T14:13:00.000+09:30

But when they met after all those years of love, laughter and tears, they had nothing left to say to each other....

And as she walked over on the edge, he had already stepped over...

Picture by ~Pirate-Cris

The Promise

2009-03-08T13:45:00.000+10:30

They stole her soul away and vowed never to return it. She swam in the sky and flew in the water until her soul found her...yet again...and this time,she kept her promise.

Picture by: in an evil

Extraordinarily Ordinary

2009-02-04T22:34:00.000+10:30

At one point in time in our lives we all get overwhelmed by the ordinary; the monotony of daily life until one day you wish you had not let yourself be taken over.

You start checking your grocery bills and try to get the best interest rate on your new savings account. Your dog's poop becomes one of the troubles in your monotonous life and you wait for that day when you'd have an opportunity( note the word 'opportunity') to vacuum clean the entire house...

At one point in time in our lives we all get sucked into the ordinary because it is the ordinary which can be done extraordinarily :)

Picture by: *glamz

Truth about Marriage!

2009-01-17T19:20:00.000+10:30

Wife dressed in sexy lingerie greets the husband at the door and he asks "How much did you spend on this?"

Happy Birthday to me...

2009-01-11T19:42:00.000+10:30

To commemorate my 23rd birthday, I got myself tattooed on my right shoulder- a gift from my loving husband. Thank you.

The 'Om' signifies Creation and Preservation. It is the symbol of the infinite; the Universe.

Thanks to all those friends who remembered my birthday and a middle finger to those who should have.

2008

2008-12-23T18:30:00.000+10:30

This post has been in making since the last 357 days...It commemorates one of the most special years of my life...This post is about what I have learnt, felt, thought of or maybe realised in the course of this eventful journey called 2008...

Marriage is the deepest commitment that you will make in your life.

Getting married to the wrong person will feel like a prison with a bad cell mate.

Priorities change with time.

Money does make the world go round and so do sex and wine :)

There comes a time when you will give up on things and move on with what is left.

Learning how to cook for yourself is a step towards self -independence.

Sometimes, it is better to act like you don't expect a thing.

Music is an essential fibre of the fabric called life.

It is important to look beyond your own little horizon and see the world...

It feels good to be alone with yourself sometimes.

Being loved works better than Maybelline.

Getting tattooed should not be a hobby.

Dreams sometimes satisfy a thirsty soul.

'Shantaram' is a novel worth being read :)

Sometimes a smile from a stranger can brighten your day.

Exchanging fluids can make you happy :)

When they coined the phrase 'spring in the step' they actually meant it.

The smell of some people's skin will always haunt you.

You will never own your children.

It is important to taste both tea and wine with utmost patience.

Religion is an escape.

Sometimes we get really pissed with those people who make us feel secure in their love...we know no matter how rude we are they will never turn their backs on us. It is unfair on them.

It is a relief to the soul to come back 'home'.

Companionship is soothing.

You will always have a lump in your throat when you think of some people.

There is a child inside each of us.

Sun on your back and breeze on your face is the best date with Nature.

23 years make me feel old...

At one point in time in life, we will all want to get back to where we started...

Always and Never

2008-11-09T15:50:00.001+10:30

...And he always let her have her way...She was free spirited,wilful and stubborn and he loved her for this. The summer was spent in long walks; watching the train go under the bridge...in stolen kisses at every corner and in dancing in the streets on no occasion. She thought she could touch the skies and she knew he will be there, waiting for her to come back.

He worshipped her, kissed her toes when she lied down on the grass under the moonlit sky, she knew she had it all.The winter was no less of a season...they sat around the fire swinging to the tunes of the guitar...and she slept in his arms like a baby cradles on his mother's bosom...

But her sleep was soon over and the dream had ended.

...And she finally let him have his way...

Wind in my hair

2008-10-28T01:05:00.000+10:30

It is orgasmic to untie your hair in the middle of the breeze and let the wind caress it with its fingertips...

Someday, I will fly.

2008-10-21T02:48:00.000+10:30

Aren't you bored of the way I write? That obscure sadness hidden in words. I am.I am sick of being sad. I have no reasons to be the tragedy queen that I sometimes try to be. Attention Deficit Disorder maybe, seems like it has been there since I was a little girl.

I think I need a high. Sex, Coffee or something? Or maybe a low, Sleep,Wine et al?

Or maybe I just need to dump my head onto the pillow and cry.

Goodnight

2008-10-01T14:28:00.000+09:30

I am so tired that I think I will faint. My body begs for rest but I can’t relent. I feel like I am in a trance; moving, because the world around me moves. Maybe those people on the street are also zombies who inhabit the Earth and go round and round in that same old circle everyday. It is strange that the world darkens when you shield from the light and it is also strange that the room spins just because I chose to spin along. Goodnight.

Breathe In...Breathe Out

2008-09-21T13:43:00.000+09:30

I reckon I am happy. Happy... happy....quite happy.My mind is so full that it doesn't have space to think any more ...think of those intricacies of life which really don't have answers...It is a pity that 'life' goes on..It goes on and on and on while the distance grows..with every passing moment...the distance, my dear reader, grows...until one fine day it becomes infinite..difficult to bridge...

It is the onset of spring and the sun warms my back while the breeze ruffles my hair...I like being carried away and not brought back...to this 'thing' called 'life'.

Into the clear water

2008-09-10T10:40:00.000+09:30

...and she let go of him in her dream that night.Was it a wish fulfilment that dreams supposedly are? Or was it one of those nightmares where the fears come alive?

Imprisoned

2008-08-30T12:49:00.000+09:30

I hate changes...I always have...whether they be for good or bad...I can't handle sudden transitions...And off course, since I don't cry with loved ones, it results in solitary tears streaming down the face while looking out from the window of a moving bus...

I so wish I had cried, cried in their arms, showed them how weak I am and how miserable I felt to leave everything behind on an unknown quest of materialism.I wish I hadn't acted strong and broken into such small pieces that nobody could ever pick.

I wish I had been 'me'...

There...

2008-08-04T19:23:00.000+09:30

I sometimes wait for people to remember me...

And the hours turn to days...

While I constantly think of them.

Redemption

2008-07-29T13:50:00.000+09:30

I sped up the snow capped mountain

And as I reached its peak

I saw Redemption

Dancing in front of my eyes

And as I reached out to it

I tripped...

Don't clamp my feet.

I will climb the snow capped mountain again...

A Gateway to Nirvana

2008-07-20T15:32:00.000+09:30

As his fingers entwine unto mine

The thrust increases with a greater force

And he looks into my eyes as I look into his

The souls lie bare naked

Nirvana; it is.

Reincarnation

2008-07-16T01:18:00.000+09:30

I want to live tonight

So that I die for you

In this battle of life and death

Salvation will bestow…

For I have sinned greatly

To be with thy holy self

If tonight I don’t surrender

My soul will not revel…

It's a Motherfucker...

2008-06-28T04:30:00.000+09:30

For You...With Love

It's a Motherfucker

Being here without you

thinking 'bout the good times

thinkin 'bout the bad

And I won't ever be the same

It's a Motherfucker

Getting through a Sunday

Talking to the walls just me again

But I won't ever be the same

I won't ever be the same

It's a Motherfucker

How much I understand

The feeling that you need someone

To take you by the hand

And you won't ever be the same

You won't ever be the same

Goodbye

2008-06-26T23:22:00.000+09:30

It is time for me to bid goodbye

It is time for me to look in your eyes

And know that this love will go on

Riding against the tides of time...

.Inch by Inch.

The Frog and The Scorpion

2008-06-14T21:31:00.000+09:30

In order to preserve my sanity,I began to read..

In the first 60 pages of "Shantaram" I read a fable,a story that has long been told.It is still on my mind and will always be.

It is a story about a frog and a scorpion.The frog agreed to take the scorpion on its back across the river because the scorpion promised not to sting the frog.In the midway of the river,the scorpion stings the frog and they are about to drown.

The frog asks the scorpion, "Pray,why you stung me when you knew that both of us will drown?"

"I'm a Scorpion. It is my nature to sting." replied the sinking Scorpion.

Forgiven; Not Forgotten

2008-06-10T03:01:00.000+09:30

I read a long time ago..."Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one but no one wants to see the other guys..."

Here is mine :D

Forgive; but never Forget. Forgiveness, they say is noble, forgiveness,I say is selfish. I forgive people to feel better..to release all the anger and pain that resides in me...Yes, I forgive but only because I cant live without forgiving...

Forgetfulness, they say is to do with the memory...my memory,I say is a tad too strong :)

Sex and the City

2008-06-02T06:30:00.000+09:30

Sex is about to be in the city soon...Woohoo...something that would fuckin' cheer me up...yeah

On the run...

2008-06-02T05:12:00.000+09:30

Run away baby

Don't let me find you

'Coz If I do...

I won't let you...

So, run away...

Funeral

2008-05-28T17:30:00.000+09:30

Today,I die

Bury me deep

Bury me deep;so that I can sleep

Sleep;so that I may never rise again

No one can see me cry...

2008-05-27T15:22:00.000+09:30

Lately,the clouds break into tears unexpectedly....

So do I.

Broken

2008-05-23T04:33:00.000+09:30

Alone I shall pick my pieces to make me again...

Comfortably Numb

2008-05-18T03:47:00.000+09:30

I couldn't breathe.

And that's why the caged bird sings...

2008-05-03T01:47:00.000+09:30

And just when you thought you knew it all...bang!

You didn't.

Life plays peek-a-boo and so do people...Isn't it fun to just live,to just breathe and to just be.

Just be;your own and on your own.

I saw a bird in the sky and I tried to clip its wings...

Takin' the long way around...

2008-04-04T05:03:00.000+10:30

I just read a comment from Mez on my previous post asking me what happened to my blogging pace:) My readers deserve an answer....I am getting married!

Since the pace of life is goin' a bit too fast the blogging pace has slowed down.Gonecase and Ankur tagged me ages ago and I havent been able to honour those commitments.My apologies.

Gonecase: Here is the tag

Tag

Ankur: Please wait for me to get some time to breathe :)

Life is taking a turn.A turn that I had been anticipating for over 3 years now.

This post is dedicated to all the people who have contributed to my life in these 3 years of solitude.

People who have been there.People who haven't.People who cared.People who didnt.People who loved.People who didnt.People who taught me something.People who learnt.

I hope this marriage brings with it the happiness and love I have always cherished.I will continue to evolve like I have in the past.

Baby, I am on my way...

Contemplation

2008-03-07T10:41:00.000+10:30

"Perfection is an impossibility" he said.

Me being my real determined self replied "Maybe your bars are set too low"

"Maybe yours are set too high" he retorted.

Maybe,yes.

I have a dream...

2008-01-24T05:43:00.000+10:30

I always had a dream... a dream I had carefully nurtured so that it can no longer be just a dream. A dream I have been laughed at for, a dream that I am sometimes embarrassed to share, a dream that might just prove to be a nightmare...

A lot has been going on in my life lately, a lot that will steer the course of my life,a lot that I guess I would willingly give myself to...

It is good to go with the flow...It is best to determine its direction...It is excellent to be able to do it....

Godspeed.

....

2008-01-11T07:04:00.000+10:30

This post is about NOTHING

Got myself tattooed yesterday to commemorate my 22nd birthday :)It's a phoenix-a victory over death and it is tattooed right above my heart...the pic is attached...

Coming to one of my fav topics'Men'..Have they forgotten how to woo women?..."You dont buy me flowers anymore..." Now,where did I read that?

Anyway,Happy Birthday to me....Muah

Drowning

2007-12-15T22:12:00.000+10:30

Do you succumb to pain? Is it a staple part of your diet? Do you also never spend a day without thinking of those hurtful moments of pain, rejection and humiliation? 'Coz I don’t...

Just when everything seems rosy and life seems promising doesn’t all that grief, those days, months and years of lovelessness come marching to you? Or is it that you invite them?

Are you a parasite who feeds on pain?

I am.

Lost in Thoughts

2007-11-29T06:11:00.000+10:30

It's me contemplating...

Captured by my man.

Isn't it just....?

2007-11-07T14:51:00.000+10:30

Maybelline refuses to subdue the swollen eyes after a night of tears.Loreal tries hard to bring some freshness to a wilted face.None succeeds.It is very important to earn the trust of those you love.It is very important to be able to stand on your feet.It is very important to understand that not everyone understands you.

It is necessary to keep breathing...

Chased

2007-10-12T06:25:00.000+09:30

They haunt me.My insecurities become demons and clutch me in their cruel hands.I get exposed in my dreams

I am afraid to sleep.Everything that I try to forget dances in front of my eyes in my dreams.Another night;another set of dreams.

I would rather stay awake than sleep tonight.Its been so long since I got respite from sleep.I just want to curl up and sleep.I cant let go of this fear;this unfounded fear.

Its like getting stripped of your cover as soon as you close your eyes...

I bet you didn't want to know these!

2007-10-07T05:37:00.000+09:30

Tagged;yet again by Sup !

So,there you go girlie....19 facts nobody really wants to know

1. Pick out a scar you have, and explain how you got it.

A mark on the tip of my nose.My mom still curses me for it;was just tryin to get rid of a stubborn blackhead...it left a permanent mark instead LOL

2. What does your phone look like?

Worn and beaten by the hands of time...err...mine

3. What is on the walls of your bedroom?

Shopping Bags:D

4. What is your current desktop picture?

What do you expect out of a narcissist like me? My pic,off course,Duh!

5. Do you believe in gay marriage?

I believe in marriage ;be it gay,lesbian,or straight

6. What do you want more than anything right now?

Contentment

7 . What time were you born?

00:17

8. Are your parents still together?

Yeah

9. Last person who made you cry?

Someone who shouldn't have...

10. What is your favorite perfume / cologne?

Pleasures by Estee Lauder

11. What kind of hair/eye color do you like in the opposite sex?

LOL..never thought of that!

12. What are you listening to?

Voices inside my Head.They don't SHUT UP!

13. Do you get scared of the dark?

Nopes.It always makes you look for light...

14. Do you like pain killers?

I wish something could kill the pain..It would have been a beautiful life

15. Are you too shy to ask someone out?

LOL.No

16. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?

I would rather have a cuppa tea

17. Who was the last person you made you mad?

The one who made me cry

18. Who was the last person who made you smile?

My man :)

19. Is someone in love with you?

Yes.I am lucky enough to be loved.

I tag....No one!!!:D

Change-A changing phenomenon

2007-09-14T21:47:00.000+09:30

I am afraid of changes-I so am. The fear of not being able to adapt is always there.No matter how much I'd like to be the person who embraces change, I would still be scared of it.I think its perhaps redundant of me to think that changes are a synonym of an instability.

If I look at every change as an instability then what about the new beginnings...What when a change might be a change from winter to spring? Why the fear of a dry spell? Aint we all conditioned to adapt to changes?

Can the fear originate from being compelled to leave it all behind and start afresh and not being sure of how fresh will it be? Changes-I think they would always go on ..perhaps that's why they call it the essence of life

Ready to Run

2007-08-28T23:25:00.000+09:30

Its so hard to escape sometimes,especially when you are all ready to run..run from closed minds and closed lives...I wish I could breathe free with liberated souls...Who knows I might just die suffocated like this? When things just aint goin' right we tend to blame it on everything other than our own selves,is that really justified?

I need to gasp for breath sometimes,or these people might just choke me...It's such an irony that people are against you just because you don't conform.Is conformity a part of being social? What happened to the age old cry of 'Let me be me'..do we really allow people to be their own selves?

Breathing Guilt

2007-08-18T22:51:00.000+09:30

Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I've lost myself again and I feel unsafe

-Breathe Me by Sia

Maybe...

2007-08-17T09:30:00.000+09:30

Maybe its just one of those days

Maybe I feel better when I say that

Maybe I want you to know it all

Maybe I am too ashamed

Maybe I am hiding it from you

Maybe I hide it from my own self

Maybe I wear a mask

Maybe 'coz you don't recognise me unmasked

Celebrating Sixty Years of Indian Independance

2007-08-16T20:51:00.000+09:30

60 years of Indian Independence;60 years of communal hatred;60 years of hollow cultural values;60 years of moral policing by the IMMORAL.

Yes,60 years of Indian Independence.

Gone with the Wind...

2007-07-23T06:04:00.000+09:30

Have you ever felt communion with nature? Have you ever prayed to waves to wash you away? Have you ever knelt to the wind to blow you along? Wished the breeze to make you fly? I have...

There are those days when you feel one with nature. Days when you wish you could embrace the mountains, touch the earth, deepen your roots...Especially when you’re tired with a broken body and tortured soul. Don’t you wish you could just unleash amidst the scents of nature?

When the rain dampens the soles of my feet, I wish I could melt away...

Amen...

2007-07-12T07:50:00.000+09:30

A discussion with a friend a couple of days ago got me thinking about religion.India, as we know is a religion hub,but how religious we exactly are?What is it that differentiates me from someone who worships a differently carved stone?

What defines me as a Hindu?Do I believe in being a Hindu?Do I even know what are the principle beliefs of being a Hindu or do I just practice it 'coz I have been doing it since birth? Did I ever feel less religious while going to a church ,a mosque or a gurudwara?Why will it ever be a 'life -striking' issue if I decide to convert to a different religion? And why exactly would a person convert?

What is religion after all? The same principle guides every religion except some beliefs which I believe are made to differentiate it from the other.For me its not about belonging to a particular religion and adhering to some of its 'illogical beliefs but its about knowing that my inner conscience is my God.That meek little voice that tells me it's wrong.Doesn't that suffice?

Tagged~~~

2007-06-30T03:33:00.000+09:30

Well,quite a while ago I was tagged by Dream Catcher and the gentleman didnt remind me, considering the amnesic that I am :) and now the dear lady Cinamon tagged me with the same tag ;) One arrow,two targets (lol)

8 Random facts about myself :) To begin with, I am random with a capital R!!!

1. I wear black nail paint...like it black...

2. I wear the duppatta on my head when I wear suits, contrary to my image :)

3. I don't follow any particular religion, my conscience is my God

4. I am quite used to being misunderstood and bitched about..I wonder when people don't bitch about me :)

5. I find homosexuality acceptable unlike the opinion of many

6. I dress according to my feeling and never according to the occasion...Keep hoping, I feel sexy ;)

7. My dog is named 'makhkhan' aka 'butter' if that qualifies :D

8. I buy flowers for myself and kiss myself goodnight!!!